Innocence and Loss

We try to protect our children – some of us. Thinking some realities are too harsh to introduce to our children. Wait we think. Let’s wait. Wait. Until they are older. They don’t need to know this yet. We call that period before they know that everything that matters is fragile and subject to loss, […]

Saints and Suffering

Sometimes when I’m really really happy and life seems to be going well, I don’t quite trust it. A lifelong habit of anticipating disaster – with an eye toward averting the worst – interferes with my enjoyment of the present. There’s more than a bit of leftover Catholic flavored guilt. Suffering was heavily promoted in […]

Losses

breathe through it I’ve been trying to “get over” some losses because even though I know better, the “just get over it” cultural norm pollutes my thinking. I’m not “over” these losses. I’m still in the process of letting go. Of reflecting on what they meant – what they mean now. Someone wise once told […]

SAVING GRACE

Loving Detachment When I desperately wanted to save my family from the ravages of the disease of alcoholism, I would have gone to any lengths to force solutions, would have said anything, done anything. And I tried in all the ways I knew how, to adjust, to shape shift, to mitigate what was happening in […]

RED LINE

I’m more interested in armor than vulnerability. In war, we don’t expose our throat to the enemy. When we are being assaulted, our poetic professions of pain do not cause a perpetrator to pause in their cruelty. We continue to believe all the displays of outrage and empathy, calls to higher ground and virtue are […]

Hateful Things

Don’t say hateful things about people. These powerful people you’re raging at probably don’t care what hateful things you say about them – but – doing so burns your soul. Don’t hurt your soul. You need your soul. *wrote this for me. And maybe you too. Love,Angela

Becoming A Collaborator

As I was flying home a United Airlines flight attendant told me the worst day she’d ever had at work was this past week on a plane with children being flown from Houston to Miami without their parents. It made me think…. Someone had to take children from parents. Had to transport them to prison. Had […]

Your Outrage Does Not Matter

Your outrage does not matter. Nor your attempts to foster empathy. This is about power. This administration feeds on – relishes – their power to inflict pain. The very fact they can cause suffering – directly and indirectly – is a source of affirmation for them. Confirmation of their ordained superiority. You can see this […]

The Truth About Trump

If we were honest this is what we would we say to young girls listening to Donald Trump’s comments: I’m sorry. Not because I am responsible for what he says and does but because It’s not really unusual. Some men say these things and worse. They say them in songs, to one another, on TV, […]