Waking to tragedy. Another day of epidemic of violence and destruction.

This is our story. It’s not our only story, but as a species, we seem to have a lust for blood and destruction. Perpetual outbreaks. Another insane person weaponizing their personhood, tossing their soul on a pyre to take as many as possible with them. Desecrating our celebrations. Blowing up those places where we come together for joyful purpose.

We say there are no words even as we go on trying to say aloud how this feels. This creeping dark misery. This sharp edged cutting thing. We can’t seem to stop or prevent its spread. Small or large. One agent of rage or whole armies of organized destruction – carving their uncauterized wounds on our holy grounds.

Our explanations, policies, policing, regulations, armies, walls and borders don’t stop this spread of violence and misery.

This message has nothing to do with despair. I love us. We are remarkable and worth saving. But I don’t know what salvation looks like. Are we all to become martyrs because we showed up to school or a celebration or a concert or a game? Or just went shopping? Violence spreads like a virus. Unseen until it erupts. Again.

All the holy teachings that encourage us to practice love, centuries of effort to become “civilized” and this is where we are – still. We aren’t very good at this business of civilization. Maybe it’s still too new.

I have high hopes for us still. That we make it through to the other side. That we cross the one border that matters. The one where we no longer give into violence toward ourselves or one another. You and I may never see that world but we do still long for it and move toward it as best we can.

I wrote this for me. I love us.