I’m struck by how much we denigrate people who express anger or rage in loud ways but have
less to say about those that hurt others with cold withholding and withering looks and
punishing silences. Passive aggression is still aggression and it hurts just as it’s meant to.

We have so many fuels and tools of hostility. Contempt. Mockery. Cold indifference. Exclusion.
Sarcasm. Frontal attacks. Screaming and raging. Calculated unresponsiveness. Character
assassination.

I watch as we use them all to hurt and hurt back. And check myself every day so that I don’t let
hurt turn to hostility or fear turn into aggression. Passive or otherwise.

It’s a big housekeeping exercise like cleaning the kitchen. Done on the daily it doesn’t take
much time.

I can tell when I need a good scrub because suddenly, I’m reading a post or listening to
someone and thinking ugly thoughts like “what a twit”. Or “that’s a dump truck load of crap.” If
I have time to criticize someone else’s housekeeping, I likely have some chores to attend to.

Time to tidy up.